The thing that worries me most...

...about academia is the obscure wit exhibited by so many truly smart people (like professors).  I stumble around on the web a bit, reading various professors' musings from time to time, and quite often, when you read the stuff academics write in their spare time, it's full of content that you know is supposed to be funny, but you can't quite figure out why.

And I find myself looking around guiltily, ready to break out in phony, raucous laughter if somebody seems to be watching just a little too closely (like they could ever really know that I was just too dumb to get the joke).

And this scares me.  Because these people are going to be my colleagues someday.  I wonder if they offer, in PhD programs, a course called "Snarky Academic Humor"?  If so, I'm going to take it; if not, I'm going to institute it when I'm finally a prof.

At any rate, back to why it scares me: the worst feeling in the world is "not getting it", and when you walk away, knowing beyond all doubt, that "they" are laughing quietly at you.

"Oh my goodness Harold!  I don't think he got it!"  (soft chuckles behind cupped hands).

"I know, Claire.  It's just so sad, isn't it?  How in the world did he get a job here, do you think?"

Whatever.

Final word: some things just shouldn't be allowed to be funny.  Examples?

-"funny" thing with latin phrases in them; out.
-unlikely kingdom-phylum-class-order-family-genus-species pairings; these are really only funny to like 8 REALLY smart people in the world.
-jokes with exponents in them; nope.
-jokes that draw on obscure cultural references (as opposed to popular cultural references); uh-uh.  Think about it, if you tell a joke that draws from some cultural reference that you KNOW only 2.5% of the population is going to understand, then you're just an elitist.

Probably more, but I'm running out of steam.

OK.  Now I'll get back to the real deal: preparing for an eventual PhD.  Did I tell you I started a Calculus class today?  Took one long ago but it was just that; long ago.  Thought it would be a good thing to brush up (and demonstrate how my quantitative prowess makes up for my pathetic sense of intellectual humor).

It's fun!